sugartool

2012-01-28T20:03:00.002+08:00

its just that sometimes in this whole thing we're in, you're right to be paranoid or do all the overthinking, and when i am just like that, im committing a sin - being difficult n unreasonable.

talk about tolerance level.

n how im beyond stoked or shld i say surprised at every little small thing you do, from staying on the phone for a 15mins convo, calling me before u sleep once in awhile, texting me when ure at work,not getting angry when im angry(our mirror neurons are so strong),reading my blog&tweets&fb bcos u want to know whats happening in my life & nt bcos u wanna see any updates of our fights, keeping your promises.

these things, the norms n foundation of being in a relationship. i treasure them like anything. i hold on to them so tight like theyre so precious because i know/expect them not to come by often.

i dont even know if thats a good or a bad thing

i just learn how to appreciate you so so so much more but deep inside im always having my army build up a wall of numbness to prepare for a disappointment

2012-01-24T21:46:00.002+08:00

im so open to many different experiences for my future, but why do i feel stuck and tied down?

rule number 1: do sth about my self-esteem

i dont realise it, but my friends are always reminding me to not think so lowly of myself. i am not insecure, but i just tend to...look down on myself. it hurts me

2012-01-20T01:32:00.001+08:00

my life isnt complete until i perfect beyonce's dance for you dancestep.

dance for my husband. doesnt matter who he is because jodoh di tangan tuhan :)

2012-01-19T11:32:00.003+08:00

you left me when i needed you the most. when i was crying my ass off because i couldnt carry the load i had on my shoulders from school to work to financial/emotional/social support.

you just left.

hung up on me. and ran so far away. didnt want to hear from me. didnt want to reply my texts.

right at the moment when i was crumbling

jackpot

2012-01-16T00:11:00.001+08:00

im such a horribly sensitive person.

when my dad called my sis he was like "yaya, mari sini sayang"

and then it was my turn he was like "wani! bikin ape kau?!"

and i was totally like

TTTTTTTTTTT.TTTTTTTTTTTTTT

-_________________________-

2012-01-07T15:08:00.002+08:00

because the world functions in such odd ways.

and people, they just know when they suddenly become less important in other people's life and start creeping in again. and the next moment you are all trapped in the whole situation of whether to

let them in (again)

or out (again)

2012-01-03T02:21:00.001+08:00

this is frustrating, i have 2 essays due this thursday and i cant get my ass working on it am i DUMB or DUMB. im just too tired for schoolwork

2012-01-02T17:07:00.002+08:00

baby: "waniiii lets celebrate our 2nd monthsavary(?) together!!"

monthsavary??? hahahahha cute la my baby

2012-01-01T01:41:00.002+08:00

so i welcomed 2012 with sean at jp's starbucks. we had heavy supper at macdonalds before that and had plans to finish up on our assignments which i havent even started in the first place and then i came up with this idea to write our own list of the top 20 songs we wanna first hear during the start of the year. to choose the song, we'd draw lots the similar ones our lists share. so here's mine:

1.All of the lights
2.Pumped up kids
3.The one that got away
4.We found love
5.Right round
6.Jaiho
7.Rihanna and avril lavigne
8.I hate this part right here
9.Best thing I never had
10.I don’t wanna close my eyes
11.Chammak challo
12.Cyclone
13.All I do is win
14.Down on me
15.Run the world
16.Hey baby
17.Man down
18.Dirty talk
19.Saxobeat
20.boomerang

and here's his:

1. comforting sounds
2. Just tonight
3. The one that got away
4. prom theme
5. a thousand years
6. say goodbye
7. End of the world
8. heartbeat
9. Love the way you lie
10. So close
11. Beautiful disaster
12. catch me when i fall
13. girls on the dance floor
14. moves like jagger
15. Run
16. wake Up
17. nobody's home
18. afraid
19. e.t.
20. castle walls

the most amazing thing was that we both had the same song on the same rank.

3. THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY

happy 2012 everyone :) have a good one aye. i love you all.

2011-12-27T02:14:00.000+08:00

because fuckers like you just spy with ur little eye n laugh at the miseries of others.
goodness ure such a horrible person arent u?

lol pretending to be all nice to me seriously. fuck off

2011-12-25T00:15:00.001+08:00

okay...my heart totally sank to the pit of my rectum

2011-12-24T20:45:00.001+08:00

if its meant to be, its meant to be.

if its not, you chose it. slowly packing away to make it easier for you

2011-12-21T00:29:00.004+08:00

ugh, im feeling so so sick and vomitty and what not right now. and just to add up to this misery, i just got to know vinny, one of my favourite (well they are ALL my favourites) jersey shore cast have conformed to the pressure of the social networking and have decided to move to TUMBLR. oh come on dude, stick to ur blogspot i used to appreciate how you were different from others.

the amount of food i ate today is overwhelming. i had mee goreng, spaghetti bolognese, cupcakes, ayam rendang, cocktail, minced meat curry, chicken feet noodle, mum's to-die-for banana fritters with spicy soy sauce and twister fries...that explains my bloated stomach, and this awkward feeling of a layer of oil lubricating the insides of my throat..n just and UGHHH feeling i wanna die :(

me : aiman, tell me what u know about me. what do i do when im bored at home?
him: you read your textbook, you sleep, watch bollywood movies, you eat, you use the computer
me : what! i do handicraft! art n craft!
him : hhahaha nooo you only do handicraft for ME...

the moment he said those things, i felt so lousy about myself. i dont even have a hobby? or an interest that can keep myself busy when i have free time. but then again, whats free time when ure busy? i wish he'd known how im crazily addicted to lists. i write lists all the time. delve into my drawers and flip through my notebooks or loose papers, all you see are lists after lists - what to do by monday, what to do before i turn 20, what to do before i bathe, what to buy when i get my first $100, what to name my stuffs, what to plan to write in the next list - hahaha i am so retarded in so many ways.

him : now tell me what do i do when im bored at home?
me : SLEEP, play your computer games, entertain your nephew, you cook something up, watch tv
him : sleep
me : tt was the first thing i said. i dont want to go on already, you suck! you dont even listen to what i say! why dont you always pay attention to me!
him : YA ALLAH i knowwww...just wanted to make sure its a double u know how much i sleep

see how we always fight over the littlest things? he was in a better mood so the convo wasnt so bad. a typical convo would be:

me : tt was the first thing i said. i dont want to go on already, you suck! you dont even listen to what i say! why dont you always pay attention to me!
him : what is your problem?! why must u say such things?! can you at least allow me to finish what ive got to say?! ure too much man, get so worked up over everything! nonsense!
me : why are you raising your voice? fine, im sorry! but it pisses me off all the time! its so hard fr me to get your attention!! sometimes, i feel like ive got to throw a party everytime i realise u are actually listening to me!
him : why do you always have to say such things? to make me mad?! must i tell you every single thing about you that i hear?! the things about u that are actually in my head?! ure full of nonsense seriously. u just enjoy picking up a fight over the smallest things
me : ___

you get the whole point. my aiman is such a sleepyhead he sleeps almost all the time whenever he has the chance to, it worries me when we actually get married and stuff you know

like i have my back facing him as i make some slutty move as part of my lap dance and i turn around he has his head thrown back on the chair with his eyes shut n mouth open..exactly like the scene in white chicks, the one the wife was like "MARCUS!!!"

i cant stop talking and i dont have anyone to talk to hahah so im blabbing here without using my brain..

whatever, its just one of those nights i have loads of shit in my head.
i'm tired already. heading to the beach tmr im REALLY excited but ive got assignments to worry about,

and i hate how great your life is judged online based on your writing skills and how "cool" ur photos look

2011-12-05T04:48:00.000+08:00

i may have shared the wrong things with the wrong person, trusted the wrong person with all my heart, believed the wrong person like a religion, and said many, many, many things i shouldnt have to a person.

it still hurts me alot, to know that what i cherish and deem to be one of the most important things in my life, is all a lie.

but then again, i may have been manipulated to have these thoughts.

but then again, i may be in denial to think that i was being influenced.

as much as i want to believe in the former, its undeniable that the truth hurts.

i can never take back the words i've said, but i have faith in the modicum of trust i have left with to know that those words will never be used against me.

if they are...its going to be bitter, it'll make my life hard, it'll be painful for me, it may even affect my future but i'll be willing to swallow the pain, grow from it, and be forgiving just because i love you that much.

today will be the last i let this bother me.

just...let it go

2011-12-05T02:10:00.002+08:00

thanks booboo, u never fail to amaze me. getting me EXACTLY what i'd get if i were there, PERFECT in size? now, you're really something arent u? ;) kiss

2011-11-28T10:05:00.005+08:00

some coincidences in my life. ive got so many of this happening in my life i thought id be interesting to jot them down. i've missed a million of them, but better late than never ya :)

1- talking about diane-35 with ateh and her sister

1- an article on BH about it

2- i was in the train, and then i saw a guy in a tshirt with the print "One thing about music is when it hits you, you feel no pain." thought that it sounded cool, so i texted a friend the quote.

2-in school working on my assignments, randomly browsing youtube, came across drake's video, "Over"....THEY HAD THE SAME EXACT QUOTE IN THE MUSIC VIDEO.

3-talked to tati about a bunch of girls

3-bumped into ALL of the an hour later, at separate places, with about 10 minutes interval each. scary aint it

4-bumped into mus and she was telling me about RMIT

4-came across an article by a student in RMIT

5-talking to siti about shikai (he hadnt crossed my mind for at least 2 years?)

5-received an email virus from him

2011-11-28T03:53:00.004+08:00

its 4am and i cant sleep....its so freaky i dunno what i had earlier to be such an insomniac

2011's gonna end in a month. just a few highlights i thought i'd write here

- 4 months internship

- 4 different hairstyles

- got to know 6 different guys

- got into a serious relationship

- a perfect GPA for the first n last time

- got myself 5 more piercings

- falling in love with my booboo over, and over, and over again

cant help but put in the last one. will update fr sure n improve my list. it looks too shallow for now hahahaha

2011-09-17T23:02:00.001+08:00

he doesnt spoil me all the time and i have no idea whether it is a good thing or not....bt that makes me anticipate my birthday even more because that's the only day i'll be 100% treated as a princess as what he promised so i cant wait to see whats in store for me :DDDDDDDDDD

2011-08-27T02:47:00.002+08:00

oh and let me add.

bob is pissing the hell out of me right now. you dont have to know who the hell he is because that is not important and i have no idea if he's gonna read this, maybe, maybe not. he's always wanted me to write something for him here. so here goes

he makes me madddddddddd. like so, so, so mad. ive always thought only a boyfriend can drive you up the highest wall but nooo you can have idiotic friends you love alot who make you laugh so hard one minute, and makes you want to smash their face in the other.

and bob, is one of them. he was there when i broke up with aiman. and we were great company to each other, we were always laughing and sending stupid meaningless texts just to sound funny and keep each other are happy.

but it just gets less over the days, but sometimes it gets better. we've been close for 4 months but only went out 3 times together but we communicate every.single.day. even when he was in taiwan.

but yesterday, we didnt hear a single thing from each other. for the first time in 4 months.

until a while ago he said hi. the thing about our friendship is that, we can be dead honest to each other. bt thats not a good thing all the time. he always go like "kau irritating nak mampos seriously" in that serious shit voice and even though i laugh it off, it hurts me alotttt. because he says it all the time.

hmm..he will also tell me that i piss him off, i make him angry la, i make him binget la, you know all those kinda things, it was okay for me to accept at first, until he says them way too often which makes me realise im such a pest in his life.

so yes, where was i. oh, i said we can be dead honest right? so he asked me how my day was yada yada and i was like okay la, whatever, i've lost touch with you. because its trueee. suddenly i dunno what to reply to him, or sound as whacky as i would when he talks to me. its stupid because we havent talked to each other for only a day and im acting all rubbish.

thought he could take it easy, which he did at first, until i typed out "i dont like you!!!!!!!". yes, with that many exclamation marks. as you all know, im definitely not in the best of mood right at the moment because of the previous post and i have yet to tell him about the argument i had with my sister. and then he replied with a lengthy reply on how how he finds me irritating because i didnt want to hang up a phonecall we had 2 days ago (yes i intended to irritate him for fun because we're so used to dragging our goodbyes for 5 minutes with "bye aje?") and how he thinks that i cannot accept him, but he wont do anything to change it, and how he knows that i hate him. and then he said he's sorry and left me with a take care.

i was like wtf?

so i told him right back at ya, because im gonna stay irritating and its sad u cant accept it but im still not gonna do anth to change it. and he replied "im tired i do not want to prolong the convo bye"

OH OKAY.

u cn tell me how u feel but i cant? it bugs me how we only want to be around each other when we're happy? its like we're happy friends but when one of us is down, we'll leave each other. we dont really wanna help make each other feel less miserable because its only fun to be friends when we are happy.

n now im assuming he doesnt wanna have anth to do with me because we just had enough of each others' crap and if that's his choice..so be it.

i dont beg for ppl to stay in the friendships i have with them. except for aiman. duh.

but i will miss him. ALOT. extremely funny and whacky guy. n nothing can ever replace the fship i've had with him.

gosh cant my day get any worse eyyy?!!!

2011-08-25T01:27:00.005+08:00

tried on new eyeshadow colours today from an old palette. hi all, or to be realistic..hi siti! ahaha the only one person left reading the shit i write here. so anyways ive been trying this product recommended by her to whiten my armpits and boy am i so pleased with the results so far :D the first time i applied it, my armpits turned PITCH BLACK for like 3 days and i was sooo depressed bt the following day there was this white patch right smack in the middle of my left armpit. so tadah, apparently my black skin has peeled, revealing my (new?) skin. so im gonna keep applying till i get the shade i want its quite freaky actually to think that if i keep peeling my meat would show.

gonna get my laptop sent for servicing later this afternoon...and my eyebrows trimmed.

2011-08-24T03:26:00.002+08:00

tried on black mask for the first time ever and totally in love with it. really expensive though if i were to stock up on it for regular use. anyway been slacking at home and turning myself into a more shallow person than i already am because all i do is sleep all day. i should have recovered enough from all the internship stress but my mind is still not set to start on anything new. for example - picking up a new hobby or start reading.

didnt leave the house for 48hours already and my brain is about to explode!!! argh. how on earth do people stay at home all week dont they feel like they need to breathe?

im suddenly so inspired to update my blog often...but its so sad how im using this space only to rant and complain abt my life and sound so retardedly childish. wish my vocabulary isnt so limited. forget abt vocabulary in fact my grammar is all over the place.

i cant write well, i cant sing, i cant play any musical instrument, i cant do any shit for nuts talented people are really blessed arent they.

suddenly my stomach pain sia. oh my gosh bye bye

2011-08-23T05:37:00.003+08:00

i will never let aiman go. he can be the world's biggest ass, the only person that says the nastiest things straight to my face and hurt me so bad with his actions, bt at the end of the day, he will always be by my side. he's the one who has my back when everyone turn theirs against mine.

he is sincere, honest and above all, genuine.

i trust him with all my heart. my precious.

2011-08-22T19:27:00.004+08:00

what an ugly day. quarelled with three different people for the lamest reasons ever.

first it was my sister. she had my jeggings on without my permission bt i didnt care, and then suddenly she wanted to change to another pair of my jeggings so she asked me. n i said no, what for, u already have my jeggings on. she replied, god ure so selfish i dont even confront u for using my $60 cheongsam top and $90 jeans without my permission and i was like whaaaat if ure gonna bring in the prices n boast abt how expensive ur stuffs are, then dont freaking wear my cheapskate jeggings which are only 25bux, since u can afford expensive clothes. its as simple as tt. why get pissed when u cant wear my cheap bottoms..go ahead n wear out ur expensive clothes la if ure so bothered by the importance of the prices gosh!!!

next is aiman. he told me he wanted to bring me out today, and since i broke my lappie, i thought we might as well send it for servicing. called him at 1, he said he wanted more slp. fine. called him at 3, he didnt answer. called him at 5, he woke up groggy and told me hes too tired since he had intensive 3hr football yday. i told him he lied, because he wanted to bring me out bt now he doesnt want to because hes tired. he screamed at me telling me how im unreasonable and nt understanding and all those nasty stuff and told me to do whatever in my life and not be affected by whatever he does. all tt just because i was upset i didnt get to see him today? seriously bro?

lastly my bro. only he and tina were on the dining table breaking their fast cos my parents were busy preparing more food, and he was reading the prayers extremely softly. so being the idiotic me, i mocked him and tina and i burst out laughing. he then stared at me like he was going to kill me any minute n screamed "kau da tk puasa kau diam ah". i was pissed so i said "kau da knape. tk betol" then he stood up and almost punching me said "ape tak betol?!" just on time my dad came out and screamed at the both of us. im like take it easy all. wouldnt be surprised if one day my bro will break my neck and kill me by accident. will have to keep my mouth shut when im around him, bt i seriously think he shld stop acting all serious and quiet at home and lighten up abit by laughing a little more u know?

so yeah there u go my horrible day. im gg fr a run to turn my day around but if my mum decides tt i shld stay at home tonight, i will just go to bed feeling extremely sorry fr my already sorry self.

2011-08-22T13:46:00.004+08:00

this is unbelievable but i am actually blogging from my omnia! it takes prolly 2s fr every letter i typed to appear so i guess ntg so long for now. just woke up awhile ago, nomal routine of slacking on my bed and letting my mind run wild thinking of things that can happen and things that cant. things that i want to happen but will never happen and things that i never thought would happen but already happened.

strange how people confidently tell one another they will be by their side no matter what happens, or whine abt how they will die if one day they wake up knowing they no longer wanna talk to each other..bt when it really happens, life goes on. just suck it up and move on. people enter ur life only to leave and that is n.o.r.m.a.l.

so why do i wake up today, pretending to be lifeless and writing this emo blogpost the moment i realise i dont the morning texts anymore? i saw it coming monthssss ago, bt being stupid i let my walls down even without you trying. allowed you to take advantage and make fun of me, and now that ure gone im a little lost.

bt its ok,if our friendship is real im sure u'd come back bt if u dont, its okay.

oh a little anti climax, i had a dream abt the guy who tried to u know do funny stuff to me bt i was smart enough to not go to the place he wanted bt stupid enough to meet him in the first place. we were in the same class and suddenly his sitting partner just screamed "kau mcm tk biasa je gi hotel murah" like wtf man why is he still appearing in my unconscious GTFO thank you. bye all have a greaaaat day

2011-08-20T23:46:00.003+08:00

hi here i am sitting on my bed as i wait for the bangla in the kitchen to leave before i can wash up in the toilet. i wouldnt wanna risk feeling uncomfortable while i wash up. i wanna take my own sweet time since i just got myself some amazing bath goodies from mustafa centre with a very old friend just now.

oh, have been trying to break my own record on tetris as well. guess i can never perform better than what i already have.

anyway, feels good to be on this page again. i have plans to get a new template, organise my archives and upload loads and loads of photos and just start blogging again. i have no idea how im gonna get back on track after the long break, thanks to my internship which have totally made me lost myself, and..how i have been so caught up with life.

truth is, im probably bothered by what others might have to say of me. i used to be able to just write whatever crap i want to but as i grow older, i just realise how there is absolutely no such thing as freedom of speech and how almost everyone in the world is born to judge. funny how at the end of the day, we will be judged by the Almighty. so why should i worry about all the petty judgements when only His judgement matters?

i dont know, im just someone who gets affected by everything. sad story.

been thinking alot about how my life is different from 5 years ago. i was that happy kid who blogs and blogs all the day..and had no worries. well the ones that probably mattered were the problems i had with my parents (well to think of it now, i was just going through that teen phase where rebelling was every teens' forte HAR HAR), friendship issues (non-stop bitching and backstabbing) and of course, my non-stop failing grades which alwayssss get me into trouble.

but life has gotten so much more complicated than that. i got myself in and out of an amazing relationship and that itself has made my heart matured and change which i can never explain in words. other than that..ive been exposed more to guys, been on dates with different people and oh god are boys horrible creatures who mess with us girls.

sorry fr the abrupt ending. i gtg bye! muacks love whoever u are

2011-08-06T04:58:00.004+08:00

just got off the phone with ezzati a while ago. it was nice to catch up a little after such a long time. i've got so many things to do, i dont even know where to start! fyp report's due in 2 days time n its scary how my partner and i have gotta come up with 6k words in such a short span of time. but its okay, we're after all queens of last-minuters and even though it takes a lil luck n miracle for us to complete it on time, im sure we're able to pull through :)

just cant wait for it to be over, and i will be at peace again.

oh, and just to add on, we're going to present our programme to the year 2s. a tiny achievement, but enough to keep me stoked :) hehe at least all that *last minute* hard work does not go to waste.

okay i can hear my mum preparing sahur. gotta make my move shoooooooo

2011-06-13T02:38:00.003+08:00

loving my booboo so much. can never stress enough on how much he respects me physically. :) god, i love you.

anyway, this thing about an old friend of mine has been bugging me so much. i lost my phone a couple of weeks ago and i had a very hard time keeping track of important contacts i lost. one of the biggest losses, is definitely afiq. we have been catching up with each other once a month n its been 2 months since i last heard from him. i have no idea how to get his number again since he doesnt use facebook...:(

2011-05-16T14:56:00.000+08:00

just trying to take a breather from the unbelievable amount of workload i have right now...reading back my posts, wouldnt be extremely interesting if i've had kept track of my previous weeks so that i have something to look back to whenever i grow old. besides the point that it makes me happy to know that im a living thing who has so much emotions and having a venue to express it.

unlike the emotionless robotic me going through everyday like i've been programmed to do.

2011-04-23T23:19:00.003+08:00

such a significant day today because i've finally completed watching all 3 seasons of jersey shore and im currently in some post-paulydjwowwsnookivinnymikeronniedeenasammi-syndrome in that order its driving me crazy. ive never been so happy and carefree after watching some reality show but this is so different i feel so fly like im on drugs

its beyond entertaining, it gets too addictive. nobody cares if its real or not because at the end of the day you feel like you're having as much fun as the people in the show and they keep you sane

my life is currently in a mess right now i have issues with different people and different commitments im happy i have this break to fix things but oh boy i let these 2 days past watching some shallow show but if it keeps me happy, so be it.

im supposed to get down to business but OHHH YEAHHHHHH SLEEP TIME YEAHHHHHH

2011-04-03T18:35:00.002+08:00

last Thursday, aiman and i met with an accident when his car reversed and hit the back of another car. the car we were in was better than fine, but the other car's bumper came off and the lights shattered. probably one of the most stressful days of our lives. i broke down because i was soooo afraid and didnt know what to do, you know all the things that go on about passing negative energy and stuff? i could literally fill his fear energy getting into my body and all the stress and tension, it was unbearable. so we met the car's owner and all that stuff and the total price we had to pay is a WHOPPING ONE THOUSAND TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS.

kak lah helped us first to pay for the damage, and aiman and i would have to pay up as soon as possible. i strongly feel that i hold the responsibility because i was in the car with him. and i didnt take the initiative to keep a look out for him, and if i did, maybe this wouldnt even happen.

so for the past few days ive been rather gloomy and heartbroken, because more than 10% of my 4 months internship pay will have to be used to pay our debts...and the dream aiman and i shared is shattered.

OUR BOOTS DREAMS.

we were saving up to get some new kick ass footwear, and we were both always like "ok, next pay we buy together!!!!1 exciting shitsxzxsz" but now with so much to pay we cant afford to even have a proper meal together or go shopping at all for the next few months. im praying for the strength to go through this ordeal together with him and that this will not affect my performance at work.

im starting work tmr. ok thats all for today bye

2011-03-08T13:46:00.002+08:00

funny how dettol wants us to be 100% sure with their products when its only promised to kill 99.9% bacteria? khe khe khe...im just tryna be anal like that

2011-02-28T21:38:00.003+08:00

having my papers on wednesday and thursday and to say that i've started would be a lie. i've only BROWSED through 2 chapters even though i had a week to study im such an ungrateful bitch i know. i promise i'll start right after this!! or maybe after my dinner? after i watch a few more make up tutorials? after i decided which colour pens to use? HAR HAR HAR.

lots of love from me and aiman!

2011-02-02T02:03:00.002+08:00

just a brief update before i get back to my work! ive been doing this way too often i know i can handle this. even though it will be of the lousiest quality, at least getting it done would be good enough. anyway earlier on i had the shock of my life the moment i checked my email.

3 notifications of low attendance...i was searching for my mc like a mad dog hoping it can save my ass if i ever were to get debarred (god willing, never).... just praying really hard i wont be too lazy to attend classes for the last two weeks of school.

i cant believe the 4 days of weekendssss!! i've got so many things on my mind that i wanna do alone, like, stay in bed all day, re-reading my archie comics collection or going to the beachhh havent decided with whom but looking back at the weather i dont think its the right time but i really really feel like lying on sand.

i hope i dont fall asleep before getting this essay done!

2011-01-29T23:33:00.002+08:00

i wish people would stop cursing the weather, complaining all the time on twitter and facebook. i remember a few weeks ago when it was scorching hot, everyone was spamming these social networks with comments how the sun will kill them etc. and now when the sky decides to pour 5 times a day..people are again whining how the rain will kill them!?

fucking the weather wont make any difference, so please just live with it ok?

i hope everyone stays safe rain or shine...but really. whatever we have in our country is better than the droughts, floods, earthquakes whathaveyous people from other countries have to go through. you cant expect perfect weather all the time.

2011-01-26T23:34:00.002+08:00

from now on, this will be my everyday look. loads of eyeliner.

2011-01-22T01:19:00.003+08:00

eeek! reading back my old posts i just sound so disgustingly depressed and sad, its not like im like that all the time but i feel like updating only when i feel so. now that its almost feb, so many things have happened and 2011 has been good and evil at the same time. i have no interest in school at this moment, and even if i do, it will continue depleting as such a massive rate over these few days and whats left...well nothing will be left.

i dont know what or how it happened, but the favoritism and biasness i smell every time i step into the class pisses me off. its getting more obvious these days what with internship in 2 months and having to work with some of the lecturers made me realise things i didnt 2 years ago. plus the assignments piling, i cant stop feeling that whatever i do now is pointless it scares me.

anyway, few weeks ago my dad got me a pretty huge noticeboard, i had so many ideas before i had one but now theres one right before my eyes im clueless on how and where to start!! will find photos to post sometime soon. anyone still reading this space? hehehe hello whoever you're probably the only one la ;p

2010-12-27T00:15:00.000+08:00

MOST PEOPLE FAIL AT WHATEVER THEY ATTEMPT BECAUSE OF AN UNDECIDED HEART. SHOULD I? SHOULD I NOT? GO FORWARD? GO BACK? SUCCESS REQUIRES THE EMOTIONAL BALANCE OF A COMMITTED HEART. WHEN CONFRONTED WITH A CHALLENGE, THE COMMITTED HEART WILL SEARCH FOR A SOLUTION. THE UNDECIDED HEART SEARCHES FOR AN ESCAPE. A COMMITTED HEART DOES NOT WAIT FOR CONDITIONS TO BE EXACTLY RIGHT. WHY? BECAUSE CONDITIONS ARE NEVER EXACTLY RIGHT. — andy andrews

i guess....that explains it?

2010-12-24T03:07:00.002+08:00

feeling a little funkehhhhh.

taken. single. NOT GIVING A FUCK.

just kiddengggg

2010-12-21T22:17:00.002+08:00

this whole world is such a cruel joke.

have you watched the collateral murder video? did you scroll down the page after clicking "i'm feeling lucky" for a google search on "offended"? how about the documentary on killing fields? ashura celebrations by the shiites' in turkey, iran and other parts of the middle east? ive been spending so much time on the internet and coming across these things have caused me to feel terribly disturbed. we are all animals

2010-12-21T03:14:00.003+08:00

there are so many people in this world living so many different lives. it scares me how these differences are beyond extreme. here i am being all upset about my heartbreak when there are so many others having to mend their broken hearts and mourn on the deaths of their loved ones. here i am awestruck by the videos of posh and becks lavish lifestyle when there are people living in cardboards during winter. and here i am hoping for a miracle to happen so that i'll have a body of a VS angel when there are countless disabled souls out there.

when will i start to appreciate little things and be thankful of everything?

2010-12-15T20:45:00.002+08:00

reading back my 2010 posts. WHAT A LONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG YEAR

2010-12-15T19:31:00.002+08:00

my 1 week diarrhoea have made me miss my 5-day school trip to trip to Cambodia and stuck at home for the longest time ever. i think my body just died on me or something. havent been so sick since i was 6???

i think my bodyclock when nuts during work, and i only quit my job a day before school started and its the 8th week already and we've been drowned in countless assignments. I HARDLY GET MY SLEEP.

so in one way or another im quite grateful im recharged right after this 1 week ordeal. now i gotta convince my parents im really really healthy already because i just wanna GET OUT OF THE HOUSE AND ENJOY MY HOLIDAYSSSSSSSS!!!

Trey Songz - "Can't Be Friends" [Official Video]

2010-11-29T01:51:00.000+08:00

we can't just be friends

2010-11-28T22:51:00.000+08:00

"it was like butterflies in my stomach, to bees stinging my heart"

Bruno Mars - Grenade [Official Music Video]

2010-11-28T19:28:00.001+08:00

"Today, I get to share with you the visual companion piece to my new single, 'Grenade.' The song is about loving someone so deeply, and the pain of knowing that the person you love does not feel the same. " - Bruno Mars

You said you loved me you're a liar

Cause you never, ever, ever did baby

But darling I’ll still catch a grenade for ya

2010-11-27T00:42:00.002+08:00

how to stop fights?

get rid of the source. simple. so simple that you have already done exactly that. stop pretending you're clueless on what to do.

2010-11-17T09:15:00.005+08:00

made a new friend today, his name is aiman. huhuhuhu.

2010-11-16T16:21:00.003+08:00

my head's gonna burst any moment during this lecture. whatever that comes out from the lecturer's mouth sounds gibberish and as usual, he is not making any sense. haish...currently multi-tasking between checking out the timeline for worldwide trending tweets and exchanging smses with a walking contradiction.

have a good day. i wish i wouldnt be as sore as i am now...but oh god what do i do? :'(

2010-11-15T20:36:00.000+08:00

still in school struggling with my video and essays GOD BLESS ME OK...

2010-11-15T01:08:00.004+08:00

if you can get rid of me and show the whole world how happy you are...i can probably do the same thing as well. but i cant. like you said, i am not you. what right do you have to snatch away my dreams? my happiness? my love? who are you to make the decisions at your convenience at the expense of mine? i dont know why i should be upset anymore, because you chose to leave? why should i be when it was your choice that i have no control over?

instead of feeding me with reasons on why you're sick of our petty fights, please just tell me straight to my face how im no longer worthy of your time and attention. it is the exact same thing, only the latter makes alot more sense. please enlighten me with your insensitivity.

too much relationship problems going on here.

Trey Songz - Neighbors Know My Name (Video)

2010-11-13T01:45:00.000+08:00

2010-11-13T01:42:00.000+08:00

i am happy.

i feel better. much better.

WHO AM I KIDDING

2010-11-10T01:03:00.001+08:00

WE WHIP OUR HAIR BACK AND FORTH

2010-11-08T00:07:00.002+08:00

i hate how my fringe is at an awkward length - too short to tuck them behind my ear, too long that they cover my eyebrows....now what do i do.

i have become an incredibly boring person i barely update anything anymore because.....i just dont bother. i have stopped bothering.

2010-10-30T11:23:00.002+08:00

what was that, leaving your girl in the dark so far from home after screaming at her without any worry if she reaches home safely? how you have your ego before any anything else always.amazes.me.

2010-10-25T21:11:00.002+08:00

can i have another day like this? :)

2010-10-25T20:53:00.002+08:00

i need to lose weight. i have to. my cheeks and tummy have expanded way too much...and the weight ive added during the holidays make me feel extremely lazy and sleepy almost all the time.

today's the first day of school. i dont feel the stress yet, but for sure im dreading it for some unknown reasons. i was beyond excited for school before this but now, the feeling is just not there yet? i cant even stand staying in sch after 6 i just want to get home ASAP

2010-10-16T19:41:00.000+08:00

currently sewing my ali baba pants after 2 months having it locked in my drawer...

the story goes like this

i bought it from a bollywood flea market at expo and wore it to school the following day and everyone was telling me how it looks comfy and all...and after a long day i had late lunch with atiqah at makan place n as i was about to get dessert..she noticed a HOLE ON MY CROTCH. nyahahhaha i wouldnt wanna know for how long ive been wandering around with a torn pair of pants because ignorance is blissss but i was lucky enough because it was a gyming day so i had extra shorts with me. when i got home i just stuffed it in the drawer and totally forgot about it until today when i was frantically looking for a bottom to wear to work.

the holidays have been great but extremely tiring because im working my ass off...with only a day off every week :(

2010-09-23T23:47:00.001+08:00

There’s so much I wish for these days, but most of all, I wish you were here. It’s strange, but before I met you, I couldn’t remember the last time that I cried. Now, it seems that tears come easily to me… but you have a way of making my sorrows seem worthwhile, of explaining things in a way that lessens my ache. You are a treasure, a gift, and when we’re together again, I intend to hold you until my arms are weak and I can do it no longer. My thoughts of you are sometimes the only things that keep me going.

— (via raindropsonredroses.tumblr.com)

2010-09-22T10:27:00.003+08:00

today im turning 18!!!!!

but im not excited or anything of that sort. because im grounded, for no reason i could understand or even try at least, alllll of my friends are busy with school & work and my ex-boyfriend who wanted to celebrate with me is in camp.

received my first bday call from aiman, then ezzati and atiqah followed by siti and hairie and lastly sufi!! really sweet of them la :) and then the smses first from who else but bestie icha, musfirah, shi kai, hidayah, hairie, gurvin and nadia. and a wholeee lot more in facebook which i'll never get sick of replying and thanking them for taking abittt of their time just to wish me :)

now that i've turned 18, im not asking for much but for me to be able to further open up my eyes, appreciate how fortunate i am to be blessed with health and beautiful family and friends, and may Allah s.w.t enlighten me to be a better muslim and person. i am more than thankful to have lived long enough to reach this age and i pray for a blessed future.

so i woke up unusually early today because my tummy was aching so bad (i have this strange gut feeling that because its been exactly 18 years my stomach's been functioning so it needs to "cleanse" itself -.-), and having a whole pile of dishes in the sink grinning at me as usual, to a quiet house...as usual again. im alone at home!

just treated myself to a warm serving of nasi lemak while watching a hindi drama with no subtitles. will now do the dishes, shower and treat myself like a princess after....because MLIA.

have a good 22 sept everyone!

2010-09-15T14:03:00.003+08:00

i hate it when my hands fail to coordinate. like how my maggie noodles end up in the dustbin, while the wrapper, in a pot of freaking boiling water.

NOW AM I SUPPOSE TO PICK IT BACK FROM THE TRASH OR WHAT.

thats just plain stupid rightttt whatever was on my mind. HAISH.

2010-09-03T00:28:00.002+08:00

i love this photo alot!! am gonna start my revision in awhile. my eyes hurt from too much reading. HAHAHA! i hate how the textbook makes me go "ok ok i think i get your point" and then when i continue nothing else makes sense??

and i have to rely alot on the dictionary because im so stupid i dont understand so many words.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NOR WAHIDAH ARBA'IN. (did i get the apostrophe right? ;P)I LOVE YOU MOTHER DUCK?!!! semoga dimurahkan rezeki & dipanjangkan umur im sorry my wishes are all so short wait for ur surprise ok? MWACKS! <3

2010-09-01T13:48:00.004+08:00

i cant stop myself from typing "its been a long time since...." over and over again every time i wanna write a new post. i have to refrain myself because it would be so ridiculous to have every post start off like that.

anyway i have alot of things to write about but it wouldnt really be interesting. just to keep track of my days. these holidays i was so busy with yog volunteering which I WILLINGLY SIGNED UP FOR whuttttttttttt!! it was really an experience which i wouldnt elaborate much because its over and i dont really remember much?? cos most probably my brain's currently jammed up with WORRIES of my upcoming exams. when i mean worries, i dont include the knowledge of the modules...because well, i dont even have much to start with. i have exactly 6 days to cram whatever theories there are for my personality&individual differences paper and 8 for my health psychology paper. it makes me wanna cry buckets of regret knowing the fact that if only i was better at biology during my sec sch days....studying for healthpsych wouldnt be such a pain in the ass :'(

i promise to tweet less so that i have more to blog about ok. personally these days i feel less uncomfortable with people reading my impulsive updates. i feel like people are trying to figure the worst out of me because of the things i say?? i know im being paranoid whatsoever but its true when people start messaging you things and acting differently towards you because of your tweets it SCARES MEEEEEEEE!! like why on earth are you stalking me like thaT?!!?!!!! u tweet at 3am n then u get a msg at 3am saying OH, SO YOU ARE DOING THIS THIS THIS HUHKJSHFDLSDFDSFHIDFSFSD11?!?!?!

okla, anw 5 mins ago i was looking thru the photos from bpghs fb grp and i dont like this queasy feeling im having. this excessive need to go back to my secondary school days because i miss them sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much. stick with the same ol comfort zone with amazing friends who are always there. i just hate knowing that i'll never be able to get back to the past to relive the moment. it will never happen again. it makes me sick missing these things and not being able to do anything about it.

and it makes me sick to the stomach too knowing that i miss you tooooo much and what we had in the past and now its over and even if we do get back on track it'll never be the same again because we were so young then both of us are growing up so fast now things are always changing.

i miss world cup too? the dates i used to always have with my best friend. my trio n bala-bala babies!!! i feel like vomiting due to this overwhelming empty feeling.

and then the next thing i know will be the fact that i'll miss ramadhan and then 2010 and then i'll miss year 2.

time..please stop for awhile, for the mercy of all mankind.

2010-08-21T23:02:00.003+08:00

why am i feeling this wayyyyy WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY !! why am i getting excited for no reason and why am i expecting something when obviously theres NOTHING to expect and it should have just stopped yesterday. i feel really bad and guilty and all that shit feeling bloating my stomach but............................................................................IT SHOULD JUST STOP HERE RIGHT.

what the hell is wrong with me

2010-08-21T17:39:00.002+08:00

i have too much freedom in this relationship it scares me

are you even reading this?

2010-08-06T03:57:00.002+08:00

sorry for the really plain and huge photos im too lazy to edit and crop them. THANK YOU TO ALL WHO CAME DOWN TO OUR EXHIBITION !!! it means so much to us, cause without you guys our grades would have been badly affected. the response was overwhelming, we managed to meet our target of 100 participants in an hour, when we actually thought it would take us 4 hours. np students are sooo supportive =p

except for some people who thought it would be so funny and cool to pass sarcastic remarks when we invited them. take it easy buddy, not begging you to come anyway!

it was a long and tiring day but im sure everyone had fun. now back to my report. LAST ASSIGNMENT FOR THE SEMESTER!

2010-08-01T22:43:00.002+08:00

how do you like my new haircut???

2010-07-22T13:33:00.002+08:00

currently in I&E class waiting for presentation to start...the lecturer sort of refuses to start unless the whole class finishes the online assignments. i feel like strangling a whole lot of people now...because theyre being such nipply asses and have no initiative to at least lend a helping hand to their own group members?? bleah. i just wish i could tell them straight in the faces how i find them sooooo irritatingly irresponsible. but then again, thats pointless cause they wouldnt care anyway.

we had dinner at tampines after a long day at expo. the bollywood exhibition looked fun but we had A HUGE SQUABBLE so we didnt really enjoy ourselves =( / =P

2010-07-14T22:19:00.005+08:00

i wish i have something more interesting to write rather than whine about how school, projects and assignments have turned me into a living corpse. hahaha but the thing is, i dont. nobody can wait for the YOG hols when finally we will be given the space to BREATHE...its crazy.

the other day i was telling my classmates whether i really am suited to be counselor in the future, because i have issues with people who...do not help themselves while waiting for help. it sounds pretty mean but i mean, really, even my religion says that God will not help those who do not help themselves. but that doesnt mean that people who seek counselling do not help themselves before seeking for it. but you know, for one of my modules we have this case study thing, and my group was assigned to help this girl called Paula who's some drug abuser and man is she TEDIOUS!! freaking arrogant and uncooperative. at the end of the day we decided to refer her back to the court because we just got tired of dealing with her, and there was no such thing as "termination" for her case.

last saturday my best friend and i watched NDP 2010 preview. it was supposed to be the 4 us, including her brother and his friend BUTTTTTTT...as usual, my carelessness and retarded brain got the better of me that i left my ticket at home :( so her brother and friend were being really cool and sweet about it, they sacrificed and decided to pass their tix to me. I AM SUCH AN ASS I KNOW!! haish.

we were dead excited to see our loved one, abang aiman in the GOH police contingent!! we are so proud of you dude!!

and the next best thing to this...

IS THIS.

A SURPRISE PERFORMANCE BY OUR BABY TAUFIK!!!!!!

thank you dear for such an amazing day. love you forever!

2010-07-12T23:52:00.002+08:00

WHO DID IT BETTER? HAHAHHAHA

2010-07-09T01:21:00.002+08:00

i just hate how my blog is turning into some emo rant page but i really need to babble n babble n babble before im all set and ready to chiong through my 2 essays. im just feeling rather FUCKING STUPID right now, because ive not been reading these months, and i am fucking having a hard time trying to put my thoughts into words. and im not kidding. i get stuck at almost after every 3 sentences and its killing me. how can i get down to 3k words in 5 hours you tell me? +the other 50% of my research. i keep telling myself i should change for the better, set my priorities right, and stop procrastinating before i die from it, but look at me. look at what the fuck i got myself into. if theres one thing i deserve right now, it will be tight slaps from my parents. i wasnt born lazy. i grew into a lazy person and i am succumbing to it now. it is unfair. it is unfair how im treating myself. im gonna let myself down all the time. all the fucking time.

when will i learn? when will i grow up? grow out of this phase?

and the last thing i need right now, is my heart&mind questioning if ive made the right decision 2 years ago. if i enjoy or at least understand what i am doing.

if im not in deep shit, i do not know what else im in. FML.

2010-07-09T00:40:00.003+08:00

im about to give up on my essays. bt the only reason why i think i can do this, is because you make me believe that i am a superwoman. thank you baby! thank you for making me believe in bullshit =p

its crazy how i miss you everyday and the chance for us to be able to spend a whole day together will only be possible 2 months from now. i love you okay. we’re going through so much crap right now but i love you okay.we quarrel everyday but i love you okay.we talk for only an hour every weekday bt i love you okay.you call me an ass and i call you a bigger ass bt i love you okay.we get tired of being angry with each other all the time bt i love you ok.because at the end of the day we will and always be okay.

2010-07-08T01:39:00.004+08:00

just a little update on whats going on...have not been sleeping well these days just so that i could watch world cup with my younger brother! other than that, assignments have and will always be a pain in the ass. my lazy, unproductive jiggly irresponsible ass that is. i have 2 essays due this friday and i have not really started on anything except 50% of research. will definitely dedicate my life to completing them tonight and tmr...transform into an essay slave for 2 days at least! gotta save my ass you see....yes my lazy unproductive jiggly irresponsible ass.SAY WHUD!!!!

2010-07-02T01:02:00.000+08:00

i love my baby monster ! ^^

2010-06-20T21:10:00.001+08:00

tell me if you wanna be alone and set yourself free

because this silence aches my heart

your silence have always ached my heart

2010-06-20T03:51:00.002+08:00

Sunday, May 24, 2009

everytime you keep me on my feet

happily excited by your cologne,

your hands,

your smile,

your intelligence

you tease me, you please me

you school me,

give me things to think about,

ignite me,

you excite me

Posted by spenbacy at 10:18 PM 5 comments

2010-06-20T02:26:00.006+08:00

i was planning to write another emotional post because i feel so messed up right now (literally too because its heavy flo' down there lol) but looking back at my previous posts i sound really depressed and i think i should move on from this screwed up phase. its not that i havent been happy and grateful these days, but i choose to pay attention to the things i dont get and have, and if i continue staying this way, i might just forget about being happy for the rest of my life.

actually there are still a few problems im facing now. some issues i have with myself. aiya, i just write whatever i have to now and feel happy later ok?

1-im having problems maintaining my relationship with aiman, because...we've always had problems? and then today happens to be one of the days whereby i'll just be happier if i give up. its been 2 and a half years since we've known each other but i dont think we even know each other but at the same time i feel we know each other too well, but now i dont really care. its not like we spend alot of time together these days anyway. and its not like we put in enough effort anyway. it seems like a break up or being together doesnt make a difference anyway. right anot aiman?

2-problems with what i wanna do in the future. 3-problems with my thoughts. 4-problems with the things i say. 5-and i hurt people alot. i hurt my friends and family with the things i say. 6-i always want things to go my way, and i get really defensive when people disagree with some of my opinions.

now for my hols, im beyond thrilled i got to spend so much time with my best friend, keep in touch with my groupmates, met the girls i've missed most - odah,mira&hid, and spend alot of time with my family. especially with my mum. its like i got to do the things i never got to do in a long time. i miss the comfort, warm and fuzzy feeling i get whenever i spend time with them. i really miss atiq and ezz too, but we're all busy so i dont think we'll even meet during the hols.

okla tts all i wanna watch world cup and turn deaf with all the buzzing from the vuvuzela.

oh and..i know ive got soooo much to do that i dont even dare check my online blackboard. ignorance is bliss.

2010-06-20T01:36:00.004+08:00

baby are you tired?

because i am...i am so tired because you're tired all the time, and it tires the shit outta me when i fail to get your love and attention because your days are always so tiring.

feels like we've been tired since forever. we tire each other out way too often.

we're both worn out arent we?

2010-06-14T23:32:00.011+08:00

photos from my holidays. not from the one im having now. bt from the one right after my second sem of year 1. hahahah too overdue!!

2010-06-14T03:27:00.002+08:00

have you ever felt what its like to linger around subjects that exude so much negative energy?

the occasional need to break free?

the extraordinary level of patience you have got to have?

these crazy voices in my head are taking a toll on my exhausted mind. the confusion ever too confusing, the pain ever so painful.

maybe i read too much into details and actions. read in between the lines too much. "padehal takde pape" kind of thing you know. but then again, i wish someone would understand this excessive paranoia i have. i dont critisize all the time, because if i do, i wouldnt be showering praises whenever i possibly can. its just that i have something to say almost all the freaking time, and sometimes whatever comes out of my mouth isnt nice.

friends do not judge each other. and even if they do, they say it right into each others faces. so please watch what you have to say. because i am just so sensitive in so many ways :'(

buchok buchok

2010-06-07T11:36:00.002+08:00

"eh u da siap2 tak?"
"errr..nak dekat. tapi dah mandi dah"
"u masih kat katil kan!!"
"TAK!!! mane ade.."
"SUARA TAK PAYAH NAK STEP FRESH LA!! HAHAHAHHAA!!"

hahahhaah fail! one of the reasons why i love you. you know if my voice is smelly or not?????

i was supposed to be ready an hour ago to meet aiman and help him polish his boots. because he claims that he "needs a polishing boot partner". well, what he really meant was that "needs a polishing boot MAID". but i dont mind really, because his boots shine wayyyyyyyyyy better when i polish them.

GIRL POWER \m/ wtf.

have a good day!!

2010-06-05T23:34:00.003+08:00

i am too tired way too tired of trying to understand, hoping to be understood, being the only one who puts in effort to make things work. it applies for everything. every fucking thing. how unappreciative everyone is towards me. it hurts me alot.

how i am expected to be perfect, to please everyone, to fit into everyone's picture of "ideal" and "normal". i am sorry that i am not ideal. and im not normal.

you will never understand my position. not until you have people demanding so much from you, after all the trouble you've gone through to make people happy. the effort and energy and act of selflessness that go unnoticed. thrice consecutively.

not that anyone's begging for a token of appreciation. but nothing hurts more than sacrificing your own interest only to be returned with not a single thank you, but a straight in the face "i am very tired and i want to sleep bye"

how can it not hurt after long hours of travelling from boon lay, to simei, to changi, an hour and a half busride to woodlands with a box of chocolates to meet your loved one only to have the person banging his fists all over. i did what i should to please you, to make you happy, and yet at the end of the day you treat me like fucking shit?

TIRED FROM TRAINING? FUCK OK IM TIRED FROM MY TRAINING TOO.

i am sorry that i cant please every single one of you, that i dont and will never meet all of your expectations. im sorry that im just way more stupid than any of you. that i dont even know what "figure of speech" means. that i dont watch the american series that everyone else in the world watches. that i dont know movie titles.

its true how people say love breeds hatred. i am beginning to hate not only you, but you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you and all of you. i hate all of you.

yes, im full of hatred. and maybe thats what i was supposed to be a long time ago. and no, i am not being emo. im being myself. someone full of hatred and filth.

because at the end of the day everybody stands alone. even the closest ones will let you down.

BABY I LOVE YOU

2010-05-30T00:29:00.002+08:00

SORRY I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT SUGARTOOL...never logged in to blogger for the longest time ever and now it feels so foreign and strange. i have a few photos from my holidays thats been edited. been wanting to post them up since forever!!! will do it soon oteyyyy!!!

lifes been normal but, abit more than normal, but normal...mm, you know... machiam blissful ahhhh ;)

2010-04-09T23:13:00.002+08:00

about a week more to school! i cannot wait!!

2010-03-14T19:37:00.002+08:00

my parents confuse me! BUT I LOVE THEM!

they get sooo naggy when i go out almost every day of the week AND when i stay at home for almost a week. confusing or confusing?

a while ago my dad asked me out tmr because he says i've been stuck at home for a very long time. the exact term he used was "TERPEROK", which is kinda true. ive not seen any of my friends for 6 days already. AMAZING.... but it doesnt really matter because for the past 3 days i've been dead tired from revamping the room!!

since my dad wants me TO GET A LIFE AND GO OUT, im meeting my bestee tmr and we're gonna get naughty in her room...................................NOT!!

hehehehehhhehhhhhhh

2010-03-10T20:22:00.002+08:00

i was playing fishville when i decided to visit Ca Sa, my neighbour's tank. and i was sooooo amazed to see REALLY REALLY HUGE FISHES 5 times the size of the normal stage 4 fish. so i decided to ask him how on earth did he do that!!

HAHAHAHAHA SO FUNNY LA YOU! TOTALLY MADE MY DAY !! but i still miss aiman like hell...ok gotta feed my fishes now! bye take care of yourselves!

2010-03-09T15:35:00.002+08:00

so this is my second week of holidays! honestly, i've done nothing exciting except for diligently washing the dishes almost everyday. exciting cause..i know the skin on my palms will start tearing by the end of the month. like how they always do when i do 50% more chores on every holiday.

i should start doing something more fruitful during my free time. like reading. maybe i can start with my textbooks. feel really horrible to know that my parents spend hundreds of dollars on the books...and i dont even read them. wth

should stock up on more bollywood movies as well hehehe

aiman enlisted in ns today. AIMAN I MISS YOU !!!! please dont forget me ok hahhaah :(

I MISS MY FRIENDS. especially ezzati and atiqah. where the hell are you girls man!?!?!!

2010-02-27T19:22:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY IZZA BABY! LOTSA LOVE! <3

2010-02-27T19:21:00.001+08:00

this new template makes me really really lazy to have long postsss zZZzzzZ

NOU SE MOND LAAA

2010-02-21T03:09:00.004+08:00

WE ARE THE CHILDREN...

2010-02-16T16:38:00.002+08:00

SHATTERED DREAMS
now how am i to move from here?

2010-02-14T22:24:00.004+08:00

???????????????????????????????????
?!?!?!?!!!!?!?!!!!!????????
WTH?
but his voice's really good

2010-02-14T16:50:00.002+08:00

i've been at home 3 days in a row without doing any productive revision...INI TAK BOLEH JADI NI!

2010-02-12T22:08:00.010+08:00

i think 2:16(pls skip anth before this ahaha) onwards is really funny! when all the coins suddenly appeared and bounced everywhere, i was like PHWOOOAAAAAARRR HAHAHHAHAHA ITS REALLY DAMN FUNNY LA!! and why on earth am i watching pet society hack videos mmm hehehhe?

changed everything on sugartool. it feels quite weird cos i no longer am using the old html template. i've even added my pet valensi above if you can see teehee!

please please help me feed him by clicking randomly in the box ok:) and if u think u've fed him too much, click on the yellow circle so mr fat hamster can exercise! and i've prepared bandung in the bottle in case valensi gets thirsty. he'll automatically drink it after he finishes his food :D

buttt i feel kinda stupid cos i made the colour of the food the same as the colour of his eyes.makes it look like his chewing his own eyeballs bleargh. but i still think he's cute! just like my human-size valensi :D

WHATZ UP WITH ME AND PETS MAN O.o

2010-02-12T13:20:00.001+08:00

baby cant u sense that theres something wrong

2010-02-07T22:19:00.006+08:00

danish (funny how he has the exact same expression in both photos ehehe:D) and his parents came over for awhile so we could all have sup tulang together! i spent the whole day renovating my pet society's living room. been neglecting my account for a reallyyyy long time. I LOVE MY PET!! HES SO CUTE CAUSE THE BUCKET ON HIS HEAD MAKES HIM LOOK SO CLUMSY!! he's called butterlock, named after my email, buttercheesecake.......................

now dont question my "creativity" i just couldnt think of anything better ok HAHA

anw was supposed to spend the weekend revising but i just cant seem to..want to do it you know? its not like i have a choice in the first place. but the fact that it is a TEST and not an EXAM makes me feel so carefree about it even though it weighs a HUGE PERCENTAGE OF 25%. a quarter can still make or break la right

one more round of tetris, a trip to the toilet for a longgg wash up, some snacks and I'LL SIT DOWN AND STUDY. i'll chiong till i die. i have only a few hours and i know i can do it. afterall, i am the LAST MINUTE GURU.......more like GUNDU. haish. not funny seh. anddd after my test tmr im gonna watch bollywood dvds (refer to post below ^^) with aiman in school!! 8D

note to aiman:
WITH ALL THE NEW DVDS, NO MORE MOHABBATEIN OK BHAIYA

2010-02-07T01:03:00.003+08:00

i hate #1 - ghosts that smile and
#2 - zoomed up pictures/videos of lizards

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

anw the sch lib has topped up on more bollywood dvds! i was mad happy when i saw all the new moviesssss!!!!! more reasons to hang out after sch. but abit NO MORE SCHOOL ALREADY.

tet.

but still!!! ehhehehehe

2010-02-01T23:26:00.004+08:00

today marks the last day for all my assignment submissions! last week was insanely busy with the preparation for PCS research symposium. i've been given the opportunity to host the event and im grateful to have such supportive lecturers, friends/classmates and co-host, tiong kiat! an experience i truly appreciate :D friday was a longgg day of CATS presentation, the symposium itself [the event went smoooothly :B] and stagewerkz - watching atiqah's performance with ezz and long lost mus :) a great show to end the busy day!

one of the most exciting days of my life. would have been perfect if i meet aiman, who spent more than 2hours on the phone with me the previous night to listen to me chant the script over and over again till i memorised the whole thing! THANK YOU FOR BEING AMAZINGLY SUPPORTIVE!!!

now that everything's over, its time to focus on my exams (4 papers) and then the HOLIDAYS jeng jeng jeng 8D

2010-01-21T01:34:00.000+08:00

theres soooo many things coming up! i feel suffocated.

im rushing through the last bits of FAMRES and BEHORG projects for presentation at 8am later, and that includes having to self-laminate 20 cards *gasp!* and i still have to worry about the symposium training schedule which i have yet to email to my lecturer. race pack collections on saturday and sunday, meeting ms juliet on mon or wed, preparing of the symposium video, the symposium itself on friday, and then the walkathon on sunday. or issit saturday? and im still having cough after a month already? what is wrong with my immune system?

and you, have to just be sooo rude to me, BY SINGING AND HUMMING SOME FREAKING TUNE WHEN IM EXPLAINING SOME IMPORTANT STUFF TO YOU. you just have to ruin my mood and piss me off. WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY !!!!!!!! i rather you ask me to shut up than annoy me like that.

COME ON WORLD!!! GIMME A BREAKKKKKKKK!!!

2010-01-18T21:58:00.002+08:00

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